Well, I may or may not get into this blogging thing. But I'm incredibly inspired by other Lolita blogs and all of the information they have brought to me. I can only hope my blog can inspire other closet Lolitas to take their first steps, as I'm doing now.
In this blog, I will reference other reviews I have read on the internet as well as publish my own purchase reviews. Pictures galore will be posted along with my needless chatter >///< Please pardon my rambles.
To begin with, I have been interested in the Lolita culture since the seventh grade. (That was back in.. oh what year.. 2008!!) Oh, those bittersweet junior high years. GANGURO GALS were my first exposure to odd Japanese fashion culture. Upon researching this dark-skinned, light-makeup'ed ladies, I found GYARU style. I admit I'm still extremely obsessed with big, pretty GYARU hair and fashion. *3* I regret nothing.
GYARU naturally led to HIME GYARU, the slightly more elegant sister fashion. And.. *drumroll please* sneaking into my young, developing mind came HIME LOLI.
The long, shiny hair.. clean, stunning makeup.. and the most shocking of all, their outfits! HIME LOLI had me hooked. After having some rocky experiences with the male half of the species (admit it, we have all had stupid hookups in junior high..), I wanted to be treated like a princess. Of course, the first step would be to *look* like a princess.
Fortunately, before the younger me could do anything stupid or rash, life caught up with me and I was discouraging myself from being Lolita. This was a step forward, but because it was a mistake to think I could hold myself back from wanting a new lifestyle.
Years passed, and my off-and-on research and yearning for Lolita was something I didn't share with others. As an outgoing person, it is hard to hide major obsessions, but somehow I kept it under wraps. I learned about Sweet, Classic, Gothic, Sailor, Guro, Ero, Kuro, Shiro, anything and everything I could learn about a lifestyle I admired and sporadically worshipped.
I wanted to be pretty. More than just makeup or clothes, I wanted to honestly say, "I'm dressing with all my feeling. This is how I feel on the inside. I feel like a princess. I feel beautiful." I wanted, quite possibly needed, to be a princess.
Lolitas are brave. It's not an easy subculture to be part of. It's expensive, tedious, and most of all, IT TAKES MORE COURAGE TO WEAR DOLL CLOTHES THAN IT TAKES TO THROW ON A HOODIE AND JEANS. However, the feeling I always got from Lolitas was, "We aren't doing this to get attention. We are getting this to feel pretty. This is who we are." And on that line, I could completely connect.
Needless to say, I finally took myself seriously and started researching like a madwoman about Lolita one night, on a whim. It was impulsive; something I wanted more than I needed. But to my surprise, I found the pieces of the puzzle slipping together like they never had before. All those years of admiring from afar had led me to this: my staircase to become a princess. But I had to know, was I crazy? Was this just an impulse? Something I would regret after a few months?
I sent my boyfriend a text, "How would you feel if I became a Lolita?"
He replied, "I would be seduced by your beauty. :))"
To which I nearly laughed with delight. **Maybe partially because I was happily surprised he knew what a Lolita was X'3**
Because, simply, it was what I expected. If I was acting crazy, then he would have responded with something either too serious or OOC. But, naturally, he accepted me and answered honestly.
That night, I chose to take a big step forward and order the first pieces of my Lolita closet.
Using the lovely Caro-chan's blog, FYeahLolita, (I'll admit I stalked the blog for many years), I selected Bodyline as my source. It was cheap; it gave me room to make mistakes and learn. That's exactly what I need as a blooming Lolita. I need to make mistakes and learn the right way, the hard way. :D
Thus concludes a long fucking rant. TL;DR: This blog will stand for what helped me through those awkward years as a closet Lolita. This is proof that a short-haired nobody girl in small-town Alaska can become a brave princess. If I can make it, then anyone can.
Thank you. Lots of love,
Dolly.
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